“Enormous interest” in safer sex!

My latest nominee for the Nobel, in lieu of any other sufficently prestigious Practical Genius award: Futura Medical Plc. Yes, once again, it’s Condom News—and this news made me sit up and take notice, as, I’m sure, it will do for a whole lot of men out there.

See, they’ve developed a condom with benefits tailored for the male psyche as well as his physiology. Yes, gentlemen, this condom helps men have “firmer and bigger erections, as well as a longer-lasting sexual experience.” And didn’t you all just sit up and take notice at that?!

Plans are for Durex to market the CSD500 condom—presumably under some much sexier name—beginning next year. In Europe, that is; as yet, no news concerning US market penetration. (If you’ll pardon the phrasing. Or even if you won’t.) And according to their market research, as well as common sense, this thing is going to be big! (Um, that pun wasn’t intended.)

Market research has shown so far that interest in the condom is enormous, Barder said.

"Up to 80 percent of existing condom users would be interested in trying the product and, more importantly, 49 percent of non-condom users would be interested in using it as it will help them maintain an erection," he said.

The above emphasis is mine, but I’m sure you all understand why. Finally, a condom that men who don’t like condoms will still want to use! It’s just...brilliant. Genius. My little sapiosexual heart’s beating overtime just at the thought. Oh, I want to meet the person who thought of this! Meet...for a start.

pxj

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Thin body, fat head

(Been under the weather lately, and feeling rather lumpish. But this got me stirred up!)

The card read “PLEASE DON’T FEED THE FAT PEOPLE”

????!!!!

There’s nothing so offensive as a vociferous convert. Or so completely indefatiguable, more’s the pity. So here’s this man, who was unhappily fat, who’s now thin-and-proselytizing—actually, by the stats, I’d say overly thin and overzealous—and who does he target? Happy “fat” people.

He chose to protest outside the 11^th Annual BBW Network Bash. With that card. Fits with the rest of his message—his organization’s emblem reminds me a lot of the “No Fat Chicks” buttons the guys wore back in high school. Regardless of how one happens to feel about size acceptance versus obesity (and why is that the question, anyway?), there’s something to be said for simple kindness and courtesy!

Apparently, all those words failed to “penetrate his skin.” Personally, I’d like to see if they could be helped along by a sharp object or two. Or sharp blows from a blunt object, even. Or being sat upon by one of my larger friends. Though my grandmother might have the right of it: she’d diagnose his problem as hunger or low blood sugar or grumpiness, and feed him a cookie or three.

Please don’t let the fat-head get your goat; you never know what a man might do with one of them.

pxj

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