Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Published, America?

PA claims not to be a vanity press. Fine, whatever—doesn’t matter to me. As an author, I’ve chosen to submit to publishers with business practices and lists that appeal to me. As a reader, I choose to read stories that appeal to me. And if that should mean purchasing a PA book, I don’t suppose that I’d melt into a pool of shame or anything.

But I have to admit that I, like many others, tend to assume that any book published by PA isn’t going to be worth reading. This may not always be true, I know, but it’s a pretty safe bet just on the percentages.

Scanning the new books at the local public library recently, I came across a PA book. First I can recall having seen there! I’m sure there are others, I just haven’t seen them. Or noticed them if I have. This one, I noticed.

REPLACEMENTS
Mary Elizabeth Garrison
ISBN 1-4241-7103-2

Without any commentary on the quality of the writing—I haven’t read the piece, you understand—I present to you the backtext. Verbatim.

REPLACEMENTS

Thispschologicaldrama adetailsayoungw om an’sstruggle
to overcom ehertroublesom elife.Raised from childhood to
doubtherow nm ind and perceptions, the centralcharacter.
M arlow K issingerisdoing herbestto succeed in herw orld.
Experiencing lonelinessandalienation, the “right” thing to
do doesn’tseem to be crystal clear.This character-driven
story unfoldsasM arlow desperately seeks the approvalof
those around her.The everyday realities ofM arlow ’s life
experiences are som etim es shocking and disturbing.
How ever,herstory isa tribute to the tenacity ofthehum an
spiritandhow life can provide replacem ents for thosew ho
need strangers to becom esurrogatefam ily.

CoverArtD esign by Paige T.Leatherm an


You know, in the print world, writers are sometimes told to comb over their pre-print galleys “with a microscrope” to catch every possible error; it’s easier and so much cheaper to correct mistakes at that stage. The equivalent post-typeset instruction is sometimes rendered as “fix all those mistakes visible from a distance of six feet.”

My eyesight’s not that great, but somehow, I think this qualifies.

As I understand it, PA authors upload their own files; chances are, this is a simple matter of the author not understanding how properly to generate the desired output format. It happens.(1) But where was the pre-release review? Did no one look at this before it was released? And, as a reader—do I want to waste my time (and money, should I be purchasing instead of borrowing) on a book so obviously unseen by any editorial eyes that they can’t even get the spacing between words right?

To all the editors, proofreaders, beta-readers, ARC reviewers, typesetters and assorted miscellaneous people who work to ensure that the books on bookstore shelves are readable—

Thank you.

pxj


(1) Hey, it’s happened to me! Ask me about my first encounter with PageMaker for an amusing imitation of your basic rabid mammal. Lovely program, but horrible instruction manuals.

Read More...

Monday, August 18, 2008

The Incredible Reappearing Author

No, I'm not...that word. I'm not, really, and please don't jinx me by saying it! But I do seem to be popping up more often. And since I'm trying to reclaim my health as well as the rest of my life, I've joined the lovely Celia Kyle's Incredible Shrinking Authors (and Industry Peeps)

Come on by, take a look! Lots of different goals, lots of different approaches, lots and lots of support.

Happy (healthy) curves!

pxj

Read More...

Friday, August 15, 2008

Friday Flash: The Postcard



In an odd mood today, so here' an odd little short. Happy weekend!


The Postcard


Silver bleeds to salmon as night becomes dawn, and I sigh, watching soft petals fold away. How long until night falls again?

...goodbye, the breeze whispers. Good day.

Noon, glaring gold and faded green, wilted heat. Promise of thunder in the distance, but only a tease; bone-white clouds fray and fade away. Ducking into a market, I am served a brown drink like mud-flecked water. Delicious! Tamarind. Bought you this postcard and a shirt, pale gauze, voluminous. The cloth smells of the shop: bay rum and citrus. I wonder if it will glow in the moonlight, as the petals do?

(Imagine me rising from a blossom, clad only by the moon and wreathed in flower-scent. Does that thought make you smile, too?)

Late afternoon, the sunlight gold as honey, shining through drought-thinned leaves and melting over melted post-work pedestrians. Office workers swelter in their sweaters and jackets until they can shrug free, rushing for their air-conditioned cars. I nibble crisp jicama white as starshine, flavored with lime and chile, and smile as they pass wiltingly by. They are so very beautiful, a garden's worth of blossoms, similar and yet unique.

Once, you were such a face, chance-spied, limned by the rays of the setting sun. And I...

I, arrayed in silver-white, sit lotus in the garden and wait for the moon to rise. My eyes are closed, yet still I perceive Moonflowers’ slow unfolding, furry calyx yielding to the need of the luxuriant satin petals to be free. The urgent approach of nightbird, moth, bat, seeker after sweetness summoned by perfume. A slower drawing-near, footsteps light as goosedown but not at all hesitant.

Your smile, as you wait for me to turn.

The heat of you in the cool night, and the satin brush of petals over our skin...

See you soon!

pxj


Read More...

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Five-Ring Circus: Condom News Round-Up






1. Gold medal for condom ads!

Man, I am SO far behind on condom news. (Well, not having posted anything in...um, moving on.) Have you seen the Beijing Olympic Condom ad campaign yet? A series of clever stills like the image above is garnering nearly as much chatter as the games themselves! The company, Elasun, has some clever take-offs on other ads as well. No need for a quip here, I think the ad-folks have created humor enough.

For now, anyway. -G-



2. Happy Birthday! Wait...who are you?

The female condom turns 15. An earlier roundup, unposted due to illness, included a study on female condoms and barriers to use. (I'll see if I can turn it up.) IIRC, price wasn't the primary objection women had to the things; the major reason these aren't used more is that a lot of us don't really know what the things are or why we should care. 15 years in production. And 00 in advertising time.



3. Sadly, you'll need more than 35 seconds


Spray-on condom has technical and approval issues Y'all remember this, right? The condom in a can, about which I confess to having made my share of jokes. Well, it's no longer coming soon.

Le Sigh(tm).



4. Every Man's Dream:

CDC pays (popular) men to talk about (safe) sex
Sort of. Actually, the program gives gift cards to social leaders, not $$ per se. No word on whether those cards can be redeemed at condom-sellers.



5. Can I be an honorary Canadian?

National Sex Day 2008 – August 21
http://canadianpress.google.com/article/ALeqM5hWc-aGdi5XyxnXo7kL53F3Ldu1tA
A day to celebrate sexual well-being. And, yes, the organizer is providing free condoms.


And, finally:



6. While you're waiting for designer phalli

Intellx recently announced a line of, well, let's say interestingly shaped condoms. SafeSexyShapes, they call them, made with a new technology that allows them to move a bit past the, um, natural model. Oh, the possibilities! The press release mentions a number of future options--Submarine, anyone? (Down, periscope! Oh, stop me. Please.) Or maybe you'd prefer to be a beer bottle, hourglass, baseball bat (!)... Available now are a flat-top model "YourTube" and the ever-popular dolphin--complete with, ahem, "pleasing bottlenose."

The deponent rests.

pxj

Read More...

Monday, August 11, 2008

...just casually sauntering by...

Let's get one thing straight: I am NOT back. Over the course of my illness-and-recovery cycle, call it the past year or so, I've declared my return several times, and each time, something bad has happened. Not always terrible, but always a setback, consuming time, money, and energy I'm quite sure I could better have employed in some other way. And, frankly, I'm sick of it.

Also, growing superstitious. "Once is chance, twice is coincidence, three times is enemy action"? Not unless the Universe doesn't like me anymore... Horrible thought, out of which such things as throwing spilled salt over shoulders is born! So, no, I'm not back. Really. I'm just posting. Saying hello. Maybe I'll do it again. But I am not back.

Even if you should happen to see me on a loop. Or in real life. Say hello, by all means, buy me a cup of coffee if you like, tell me about your new book--I'm always interested in that--or whatever's got you smiling or amusingly ranting. I miss you all, and I'd love to get caught up!

Just...don't, please, whatever you do, say "welcome___" to me.

K? Thnx.

pxj

Read More...